Some of this is hard to talk about in paragraphs. It’s easier in list form. Most of this is me letting you hear the voices in my head. The voices that spend too much time talking to me about me and stuff that probably won’t matter much when I’m 80.
- I’ve run out of free space in my Flickr account. Do I want to pay to store my photos online? Should I look for a less expensive option? Split my photos between free accounts? Print everything and press DELETE?
- I’m thinking about turning off comments. I like feedback, discussion, and attention. I wonder if it be easier to write whatever I want, say what I have to say, enjoy my own writing more if I wasn’t anticipating comments. Sometimes comments make me feel good, validated, supported. But I do feel disappointment when I don’t get comments I sort of thought I’d get. Or when I don’t get comments from people I thought for sure would say something. Oh, how that stings. It’s worse than hateful comments from trolls. I wouldn’t be expecting comments if I’ve turned them off, and feedback would come in the form of links back or emails. That seems more meaningful, intentional and genuinely connected, doesn’t it? Or not?
- I talked recently about blog popularity. There’s something else bugging me about that and it’s hard to explain, so bear with me. Given the nature of my blog and the blogs I read, there seems to be a sense of community (or communities, really). I think I fit in there somewhere, but I am not sure where. A few times I’ve been talking about someone whose blog I read and have discussions with and I started to say, “I have this friend…” or “This friend of mine…” or “This woman I know…” and I stop. Because I’m not sure. Are we friends? Do I know you? If you heard me refer to you as my friend or even as someone I know, would you think, “Pfft. Yeah, whatEVER, freakshow.”?
I like keeping a weblog. I like reading your weblogs. I don’t think I’ve been making reading and writing choices based solely on being liked and included, but I think it is really hard to avoid entirely. Sometimes I realize I just keep marking an RSS feed as “Read” and only subscribed to it because they said something I liked once. Or someone I like reads them so it must be good because Mikey likes it!
I do think I’ve been leaning too much on my internet connection for adult conversation and support. It’s so easy. I don’t have to put on a bra or brush my teeth or refrain from farting to talk to a grown-up. I love that about you. Except for a small number of you, we can’t go to lunch next week or meet at the park or hang out in each other’s kitchens sipping tea and sharing gossip. For the few readers I can do that with, I probably email you a lot more than I see you. Some of that is busy life. Some of it isn’t, though. Some of that is because I don’t like wearing a bra, my breath stinks and I’m gassy.
Ah. There. My bellybutton is lint-free!
Me you should put in the friends column, even though I’m not here so much. Because I think of you as my IRL friend whom I met online, even though we’ve never met and you live soooooo far away. You are just one of the bonuses of being such a net addict–a real writer out there on the prairie.
See me? I have a hard time keeping up. I LOVE to blog. I LOVE comments. I LOVE taking pictures (the flickr acct. is soooooo worth it and CHEAP at $25/annually), BUT I am having a hard time reading those I love. And y’know, those I love to read are NOT read b/c of someone else. I read who I read b/c their writing, personality, charm, wit, or sometimes even just their pictures appeal to me.
That or I just love them.
But my commenting has turned to the lean side. And that’s not fair. I realize that.
Either way - I’ll still read you coolio.
Ew. See? This is me: oh that stings!
Because me? I write FOR the comments because the comments are what cements my friendships. Even if they are online, and even if my online friends and I disagree. To me thats a friendship. An aquaintenceship?
I dunno. There is this thing? And its a pen. Also, put together with paper? Journal. Private.
I just like to be out there, personally.
Which is why I like livejournal. I can pick and choose my friends. I mean, I have like 5 on there, and two that I actually work with! So they are real. But then I have one on there that I just love to death. Its all about the dialogue with me. Can you tell? Can you see that you dont want to hear any of this, but here I go again??!! Gah! Im so mouthy.
And I journal not because I want to write, I do it because sometimes Big Hands is an ass. And sometimes my son says funny stuff. Look at my family! Arent we something…blah blah blah.
Im a total voyeur. Let me look into your life.
Anyhoodle. I like you cuz Mikey likes you. And, I love me some Mikey.
I can barely comment because I second guess myself too much. “Ohmygod, did I reveal too much? Am I going to offend her ‘other’ friends- She thinks I’m a ‘tard”
Was that offensive? Tard?
See? I’d rather just email you. Email is more personal. NOT that commenting isn’t.
forgetit.
You can delete this for me later.
I just typed and typed and typed a reply for each of you and then realized I’m so loopy on my nighttime medication that it is dangerous to leave that much written luvin’ unattended while I sleep this off.
Until then, you can say tard on my blog. As long as you’re fighting nice.
Muah!
[...] Go give some assvice about blogging. [...]
Yeah, I hear ya!
I’m too much of a comment whore to ever turn mine off though.
When I click “jump to comments” there’s no jumping.
What’s up?
It’smeDe - It’s jumping for me as long as the page has already loaded completely. One of my links is dragging its feet today, bogging everything down.
Ruthie - I never pause when I’m talking about you. I know, my superhero friend. Thank you for that compliment.
OMSH - I want you to comment if you feel like commenting, not because you feel you should or have to. Realistically, that’s what I want all around.
jen - If I shut off the comments, I would miss you like crazy. Emphasis on crazy. You nut.
MammaLoves - It’s hard, isn’t it? I love comments when they’re good, and sometimes when they’re bad, too. It’s the missing ones that poke at my insanity.
But these are problems to have, for sure.
Oh, leave em on … but know that sometimes (often?) we read and don’t comment. And still love you.
Good thoughts.
I used to blog for comments, but realized I was driving myself crazy. Maybe I’m just insecure. Are you insecure?
It’s a relative really.
“itsjustme” - I think a lot of bloggers feel this way about comments. We don’t talk about it because it’s 1) boring and 2) hard to talk about things we’re insecure about.
I know who you are and future comments that are left with one of your “anonymous” names will either be deleted or edited to include your original blog user name.
have missed reading you for a while and had to say I am still around and love reading even if its all in one sitting for like 4 hours lol