Hockey game on Saturday was fun even though I was annoyed by the people around me on the bus. If my husband was a people-watcher, that last sentence would read: "I was entertained by the people around me on the bus." But since my husband doesn’t see the joke in the words and actions of strangers and therefore can’t laugh with me, I was just irritated. And after two of them stole seats in our crowded row at the game, I was experiencing something like The Rage but not quite The Rage itself. Something like The Rage’s weaker second cousin. Which is good because The Rage’s weaker second cousin doesn’t propel my fist through the back of that woman’s head every time she laughs retardedly* at nothing. But it did make my right hand itchy.
There was a fight during the third period and that almost made up for the hometown team’s suckitude at finding the goal. How do you stay on one end of the ice allllll night long and only come up with one goal? I’ll tell you: SUCK AT FINDING THE GOAL.
I’m feeling okay today so far. The kids were late for school and I had to give them the "Mom Doesn’t Care If You’re Late For School Because She’s Cool and Also Irresponsible" pep talk when I dropped them off. "So don’t cry when the secretary isn’t nice to you because she’s not your mama. I am. And I say you can be late for school sometimes and it will be okay. But not for church. Get your ass out the door for church. Have a good day, sweeties."
All of that to say my mental state is okayish today. But my hair looks like garbage.
Speaking of garbage, I have a purse. It weighs 4lbs. 4oz. The items I consider absolutely essential include the following:
- Appointment book
- Wallet (mini purse, really)
- Hair clip
- lip gloss
- chapstick
- keys
- Tylenol/Sudafed combo tablets
That stuff weighs exactly 1lb. Just one. So I’m carrying around 3.4lbs of useless crap in my purse. Oh, and the purse weighs something itself, I guess. But still. That’s a lot of crap. I also have a lot of papers, a lot more lip gloss and chapstick, multivitamins (which I carry in my purse because I’ll probably remember to take them at work but then I don’t so I’m really just carrying them around and never taking them. Ever.) pens, pressed powder, an eyeglass case and 2lbs of scratch paper, receipts and drinking straw wrappers. Whatever the purse is made of is starting to break down and flake off, so I often arrive somewhere looking smashing save for the chunks of brown flecky things I somehow rubbed off my hands onto my face. Awesome!
Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day and I am getting my husband something super fun. He’s going to LOVE it. Then I’m taking him out on Saturday. But I’m making him drive because he is the worst passenger ever. (Love you, baby! Shut up or get out of my car!)
*ARR! HA!HA!HA!HA!HA!HA! -point and clap- HA!HA!HA!
