When I woke up this morning (at 7:00 - argh!) I was unable to move for a few minutes. My back was stuck and my upper body was so stiff, I couldn’t breathe normally. I’d sort of whimper on the exhale. So I laid in bed rocking a little, trying to work out the kinks in my body. Once I was able to move, I slid out of bed and checked on my son who thought it would be fun to have his siblings’ fever and came down with it last night.
Moving around felt good and stretching helped a lot. I felt refreshed and rested and energized. I cleaned up, wrote a note for The Man and headed out for a coffee and the local Sunday rag. I gassed up my car and read the paper while I was sitting in the car wash that is so “Touchless” it didn’t really wash the hood. Or the sides. Or anything, really. But the coffee was good and my youngest kids were up and being quiet when I got home.
The toddler sat on the table, “reading” the coupon portion of the paper. In his world, “reading” means “shredding”, and that means mama gets to skim all the editorials to see what locals are hollering about this week. I didn’t care for the “Editor’s Note” after the byline for one local’s response to a previous Editor’s column. In this small town, there is no need to list the person’s occupation or other social interests. We know what he does. The Editor’s decision to point it out made him look like a sissy.
I’d like to talk a little more in depth about that so it would make more sense, but I don’t want to give up information that would lead a wacko to my doorstep. So play along and pretend that last paragraph makes sense.
After reading the paper, I tried to give the toddler food. He won’t eat for me! It’s so frustrating. He kept pointing and grunting but I never figured out what it was he wanted. He started to act sleepy, so I went back to bed with him hoping he’d nap. He didn’t. I did. Contacts in. Crap.
If I have caffeine and then somehow fall asleep right away, I will be unable to control my snoring, my drooling or my limbs. I will wake up and want to be up, but cannot lift my arms or legs. Turning over can be very difficult. I haven’t experienced this sensation for a long time. It usually happened after drinking a pot of coffee mud (made lovingly by my younger brother who liked to chew his coffee as a youngster) and writing a research paper start-to-finish in one evening (the night before it was due. Always.)
I’m still hungover from my caffeine nap and while my snoring, drooling and limb movement are under control, my funny hasn’t woken up yet. It is sleepy. Poor funny.
I’ll wait to write about my Saturday until the funny is up and about. It’ll be more entertaining that way.
